I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
