why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
I just found puke in my bra..
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Randomize
