you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize
