and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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