Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Randomize
