how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
