HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
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