When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
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