I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
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