I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize