I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
