today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Randomize
