Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
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