mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Randomize
