You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize