And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then he tried to convert me to islam
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
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