just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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