you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
We have started to decorate penises.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
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