Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Randomize
