ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Randomize
