peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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