wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
we're making bets on your personal life
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Randomize
