i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Randomize
