Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
