You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Randomize
