just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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