Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize
