So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Randomize
