You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
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