how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
