like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Randomize
