He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
