Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
You need a sexual gate keeper
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Randomize