Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
try to milk me bitch
Randomize