he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
No stitches, just platelets and will power
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
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