Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
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