you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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