alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
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