just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize
