ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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