Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
