If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
he was screaming in a recently acquired accent that he paid for delivery and they could cancel the entire order if they didn't come upstairs
I thought you said it was going to get worse not hilarious.
the delivery boy turned out to be my students mother. now she knows that i have incredibly low standards AND thanks to the fact that he still has dialup the pizza tracker was way off and she rang the bell and he answered mid bong rip.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Randomize
