Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
