sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
there is glitter all over my balls
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
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