sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
