my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Randomize