no, he came in my armpit
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
