Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
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