omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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