I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
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